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May I have your
attention please?
May I have your
attention please?
Will the real Slim
Shady please stand up?
I repeat will the
real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're going to
have a problem here
c
(Verse 1)
Ya'll act like you
never seen a white person before
jaws all on the
floor like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door
started whoopin
her ass worse than before
they first get
divorced throwing her over furniture (scream)
It's the return of
the
"Oh wait, no
way, your kidding, he didn't just say what I think he did, did
he?"
And Dr Dre said
....Nothing you
idiots Dr Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (haha)
Feminist women
love Eminem
Chicka chicka
chicka Slim Shady I'm sick of him
look at him,
walking around grabbing his you know what
limpin' to you
know who "yeah, but hes so cute though"
Yea I probably got
a couple of screws up in my head loose
but no worse than
what's going on in your parent's bedrooms
Sometimes I wanna
get on TV and just let loose,
but can't, but its
cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
my bum is on your
lips, my bum is on your lips
and if I'm lucky
you might just give it a little kiss
and that's the
message that we deliver to little kids
and expect them
not to know what a womens clitoris is.
Of course they
gonna know what intercourse is
by the time they
hit 4th grade,
they got the
discovery channel don't they?
We ain't nothing
but mammals; well some of us cannibals
who cut other
people open like cantaloupes.
But if we can hump
dead animals and antelopes
then there's no
reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel
like I feel I got the antidote.
Women wave your
panty hoes, sing the chorus and it goes...
(Chorus)
I'm Slim Shady
Yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim
Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real
Slim Shady...
Please stand up,
Please stand up, Please stand up
becuase I'm Slim
Shady
Yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim
Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real
Slim shady...
Please stand up,
Please stand up, Please stand up
(Verse 2)
Will Smith don't
gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
Well I do, so fuck
him and fuck you too.
You think I give a
damm about a Grammy?
Half of you
critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me.
"But Slim
what if u win wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? So you guys
can just lie to get me here?
So you can sit me
here next to Britney Spears.
Shit, Christina
Aguilera better switch me chairs
So I can sit next
to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
And hear 'em argue
over who she gave head to first.
Little bitch put
me on blast on MTV
"yeah he's
cute but I think he's married to Kim, hehe"
I should download
her audio on mp3
And show the whole
world how you gave Eminem V.D. (scream)
I'm sick of you
little girl and boy groups all you do is annoy me
So I've been sent
here to destroy you
And theres a
million of us just like me
Who cuss like me
Who just don't
give a fuck like me
Who dress like me
Walk, talk and act
like me
It just might be
the next best thing
But not quite me
(chorus)
(Verse 3)
I'm like a
headtrip to listen to
Cause I'm only
giving you
things you joke
about with your friends inside your living room
The only
difference is I got the balls to say it in front of ya'll
And I don't gotta
be false or sugar coated at all
I just get on the
mic and spit it
And whether you
like to admit it (rip)
I just shit it
better than 90% of you rappers out there
Then you wonder
how can kidz eat up these albums like valiums.
Its funny cuz at
the rate im going when I'm 30
Ill be the only
person in the nursing home flirty.
Pinching nurses
asses when I'm jackin' off with Jergens and I'm jerking
But this whole bag
of viagra isn't working
And every single
person is a Slim Shady lurkin'
He could be workin
at Burger King spitten on your onion rings
Or in the parking
lot circling
screaming I don't
give a fuck
With his windows
down and system up
So will the real
Shady, please stand up
and put one of
those fingures on each hand up
and to be proud to
be outta your mind and outta control
and one more time,
loud as you can, how does it go?
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